Crazy Sue, Part 2.

So today Sue gave me an astrological reading at work. Then she made me this amazing coolata she calls almond joy. It was like slushie heaven.

Anyway, we were standing there methodically putting napkins in bags and she asked me when my birthday was and then proceeded to list personality traits I supposedly have. Then she told me Aquariuses (aquarii?) are stubborn, like food (keep in mind that she already knew I was Italian!), are easygoing, like the color blue, and have shin pain.  She's crazy. Though some of it was pretty accurate.

This was way more awkward/interesting in person, but just let me say this made work a lot more entertaining.

I'm related to crazy Sue.

So in case you haven't caught this fact yet, I'm working at my local donut establishment now. Anyway, there's this lady there, my coworker, who is just crazy. She's 57 (and she'll remind you of it at least twice a day) and I swear she would break a mood ring. One minute she's all "oh Allison, you're such a nice girl" and the next she's all "why the hell aren't you helping me!! Don't be so shy!!!"

Anyway, I know I kind of gave away the ending in the title, but here's the story anyway. So this girl comes into the store and starts ordering, and Sue goes crazier - "OMG, that's my niece, OMG lemme make her coffee all special and take 16 years to do it..., etc" So I stop listening and go about doing my job. Once the girl leaves, she feels this undeniable need to explain herself. So as I'm trying to concentrate on making a latte lite with mocha and 18 splenda or whatever absurd order I was filling, she's blathering on about how they're not really related but she's the daughter of a close family friend and blah blah blah...I don't see why it requires a ten minute explanation, but apparently she does. So I politely pretend to be listening.

She ends this story with by explaining that she's from Geneva. Apparently they "weave a tangled web" or some equally creepy sounding phrase. Now here's where I make my mistake - I open my mouth. I say that I have family in Geneva as well, you know, just to make conversation. So then she asks who...a little to excitedly...suddenly I have that feeling where I know what's going to happen but I can't do anything to stop it...so I tell her, listing a couple last names (as I have a large Italian family, which, truth be told, is kind of centered in Geneva).

Sue: "OMG, you're a CAHL-eee-breazze!?!?"
Me: "Yeah I guess, that's my Gramma's maiden name"
Sue: "OMG do you know Ralph!?"
Me: "Yup, he's my great uncle"
Sue: "And your Gramma is...?"
Me: "Toni"
Sue: "OMG, OMG I love Toni!!"

By now you can imagine her excitement and my dread. She knows my family. Like a lot. And I'm about to find out why...

Me: "hehe yup, me too." (how awkward of a response was that!!)
Sue: "OMG, so you're related to Phoenixes!!"
Me: "Yup, Eunice is my great aunt"
Sue: "OMG so you know Debbie Phoenix!?!?"
Me: "Yeah, she's a Thibault now..."
Sue: "Oh I know. OMG I love Debbie! I graduated with Debbie!! We used to walk the streets together (I swear that's the exact phrase she used. If I wasn't dreading the outcome of this conversation so much I would have laughed). We used to party together!!"
Me: *awkward chuckle and attempt to escape*
Sue: "OMG, we're related!!!"

So know I'm trying to think of how that makes us related, and then I remember the story about her fake niece and figure, hey, maybe it doesn't take too much to be considered family...but wait, there's more. A tangled web indeed...

Sue: "Do you know Joey and Angela!? Angela is my niece!"

Don't worry, I'll condense the rest of this misery for you. Yup. I know these people. They're my grandma's brother's grandchildren. They come to family parties, etc. I've probably kissed these people thousands of times. Anyway, Sue is their father's first (or second, I'm not sure) wife's sister.

So she tells everyone in the store that we're related, and she continues to not let it go...but hey, she's a little less crazy toward me so maybe it was worth it... eh.

I'm going to Italy...eventually.

So on Wednesday or Thursday night of last week my sister had a soccer game in Greece. My dad grew up in Greece,and my great uncle (my grandpa's brother) still lives there. This is the man who speaks with a thick Italian accent (hard to understand sometimes) even though he's been "off the boat" (Mary!!) for something like 50 years now. and kisses you on both cheeks to greet you. He's very, very Italian.

So after my sister's soccer game we head over there and marvel at his amazing garden. It's like a frickin jungle.He has tomatoes, greens, mint, basil, peppers, eggplant, broccoli, fava beans, swiss chard, and probably 15 other things that I couldn't identify. He also has a cherry tree, a peach tree, a fig tree, and an apple tree. It's truly amazing to see so much garden in so small a backyard. Anyway, I try some fava beans, and start eating them like popcorn. All of it makes me nostalgic for my childhood and reminds me of my grandpa.

Anyway, we go inside and eat this amazing zucchini dish and some fabulous homemade biscotti and my grandma, great aunt, and uncle reminisce about the old country. Overall it was a wonderful evening.

Also, I vowed to save enough money to pay for myself, my grandma , and my brother to go to Italy so she can see the place where her parents were born. I aim to accomplish this within the next 7 years.

Bee-sting remedy

So today I was the lucky recipient of a bee-sting. My fourth, for the record. I was playing soccer in the backyard with my siblings (which, let me just say, is quite a rare occurrence, because my brothers tend to find it a bother to join my sister and I) when I felt a sharp, stinging pain on the sole of my foot. "Take a knee!" I yelled, as I dropped to the ground like a Brazilian soccer player (this game had elaborate rules, right down to corner kicks, penalty kicks, and drop balls. Keep in mind that this is semi-comical considering the size of our backyard [about 20 paces]).

I gimp over to the hose, rinse my foot off under the hose (which is basically the same as applying ice) and examine my wound. Sure enough, there's a angry red bee sting right in the middle of the sole of my foot. I stoically decide to play through the pain and kind of forget about it.

Until later that day when it started itching like crazy! I remembered applying some sort of homemade concoction on one of my previous bee stings (which was between my toes, btw), so I googled home remedies for bee stings. I found this site listing quite a few, so I decided to combine some.

It said fresh basil could relieve itching, so I went outside, picked a large leaf of basil, and proceeded to rub it on my foot. My foot smelled nice and was kind of making me crave Italian food, but it still itched, so I tossed the basil in the bowl and and put in water and a healthy amount of baking soda AND baking powder (because I didn't remember which one the remedy called for) and then sat on the kitchen floor and messily rubbed/ poured it onto my foot. 

So far, I declare it a success. 

Bringing home the dough(nuts).

So I have a job at Dunkin Donuts now. I've had it for a couple weeks now actually. Yet I am still in training, at least until the end of the week. I swear the manager believes that making coffee is akin to brain surgery. Anyway, I mastered the coolata machine today, only made one wrong coffee, and cashed my first paycheck. I also got to know some of my coworkers better, which is cool because I was kinda freaked out when I started my shift today because it was just me and 3 guys. One was especially nice and helped me along and we talked about his aunt, his tattoos, and life in general.

The end.